It Hurts
Joe says to Mike behind him, 'My elbow hurts like heck. I
guess I'd better see a doctor.' 'Listen, you don't have to spend that
kind of money,' Mike replies. 'There's a diagnostic computer down at
Wal-Mart . Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you
what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten
dollars. . . A lot cheaper than a doctor.' So, Joe deposits a urine
sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars
and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the
sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a
printout: 'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid
heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @
Wal-Mart. That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology
was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some
tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and
daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.. Joe hurries back to
Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in
his concoction, and awaits the results. The computer prints the
following: 1 Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.. (Aisle
7) 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your
wife is pregnant with Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. 5 . If you
don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better!
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